About the Author

About the Author


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The formalities

Who I am:

Mark D. Bej, M.D.

What I look like:

What I do:

Senior Permanent Emeritus Research Fellow
..er.. they got tired of that one and bumped me up to make money for the organization. I am now...
Clinical Associate, Section of Epilepsy and Sleep Disorders
Research Fellow, Section of Neurological Computing
Department of Neurology

My snail-mail address:

Department of Neurology
Cleveland Clinic Foundation S-51
9500 Euclid Ave.
Cleveland, Ohio 44195 U.S.A.

How to pronounce my name:

The number of variations of my surname that I've seen on various pieces of mail sent to me are, to borrow a phrase from medical laboratory work, "TNTC", i.e, too numerous to count. (Well, not really ....) Basically, few people can imagine that this is a real name. I don't blame them, since it actually is not -- but not for the reasons they think.

The name is pronounced "Bey" (for speakers of English). Speakers of German, Polish, Czech, and Latin (?and Italian) will have no trouble with it and may pronounce it "directly". Speakers of French and Spanish may wish to respell it mentally as "Bei" (but one syllable).

The name has Tatar origins and was shortened from Sulma Agha-Bej (or Bey) quite some time ago. "Sulma" is actually the proper surname, both Agha and Bej being titles. Bej would be recognizable to Turks, though Attatürk's alphabet scheme would have it written as Bey. The j comes about in the (or at least one) standard transliteration scheme from Cyrillic alphabets into the Latin alphabet.

How to reach me:

E-mail <bejm@eeg.ccf.org>
Direct Phone (216) 444-0119
Operator (216) 444-2200 bpr 24095
Fax (216) 445-6617
Voice mail is available via direct phone extension


Other potentially useful (?) information (?)


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The author had been rumored to be driving around a car with the following license plate:

It was then alleged that, to evade public scrutiny, he changed states -- by sublimation, some have said -- and that he currently sports the following:

The meaning of these strangely similar statements is yet to be fully elucidated. One could say that they are enigmatic riddles, and wrapped in a mystery to boot. It is strongly suspected that the experts are correct in predicting that these apparently random rantings (or ravings, if you will) will have less impact on the world than had the Rosetta Stone.

Allegations that the scrawlings are strikingly similar to that of a word for "plague" in some unstated, obscure tongue, and that this might in some small way be connected to the author's chosen profession, seem hopelessly inadequate.

In a clear breach of medical ethics, it has been revealed that the author's psychiatrists are at work on this problem, which they believe to be a statement of some form of rebellion. The apparent obsession with the number "3" is entirely unclear. Rumor has it that the full meaning and implications of the statement are also a mystery to the author's friend(s) and family, if any.


The author may or may not have been more or less loosely associated with any or all of the following:

Shippensburg, Pa.
(The image is a map of the maze built during Shippensburg's Corn Festival. It was called "The Amazing Maize Maze", of course. Click on it to see a color version.)
Franklin & Marshall College
Milton S. Hershey Medical Center, Pennsylvania State University
National Institutes of Health
Thomas Jefferson University
Cleveland Clinic Foundation
Case Western Reserve University
American Clinical Neurophysiology Society

Here's my brother's web page. No more goofing around, have to be serious now.
Ready? Oh, sorry, his law firm removed it when he left.


Mark D. Bej
bejm@eeg.ccf.org
+1 216-444-0119
1998.11.13